Cleavage

Is it just me, or is there more cleavage on display this year at school? I remember hearing one of the administrators say something about how the dress code exists to reduce distractions in the classroom. This was at one of the beginning-of-the-year speeches they always make right after school starts -- you know, the ones where they come into a classroom to talk and answer questions for half an hour. When I heard him say that the dress code would reduce distractions, I thought to myself, "I think you got that backwards, Chief! The classwork is distracting me from my real purpose, which is to surreptitiously stare at pretty girls." And there was part of me that actually believed that for a long time. But then I took a stroll to the pencil sharpener.

Friday. Third period. Quiet scratching of graphite on paper as the class finishes a worksheet the sub handed out. She hears my lead snap and looks over, so I hold the pencil up and gesture toward the pencil sharpener on the wall by the door: May I? She nods and goes back to her magazine. I rise and begin my winding trek between the rows and up the aisles around the many desks between mine and the pencil sharpener. The trip is uneventful and few, if any, of the hunched students bother to look up as I make my way past. Pencil sharpened to a fine point and ready to finish the last four questions of the worksheet, I turn to face the class. Nothing has changed but my perspective; however, from this standing vantage point I am suddenly aware of how much "natural scenery" I will encounter on my return trip. How can I say this tastefully? Let's just say that when the air is clear and the sun is bright, the mountains and valleys present an incredible view. And I gotta be honest: I could see a long way into some of those valleys! In fact, one canyon I passed was so deep that I could almost see all the way to the mountain peaks! Yes, it was a distraction, and I never did finish that worksheet.

I can hear some of you now: Geez, you perv! Avert your eyes! Just because it's on display doesn't mean you have to stop and stare! But, I promise, I wasn't doing that! I averted my eyes from one shadowy valley and found myself facing the gentle slopes of another. The trip back to my desk was a veritable range of mountainous terrain, and short of closing my eyes and stumbling blindly through the aisles, there was nothing I could do to prevent myself from seeing far more than I should have.

Part of it was the fact that I was standing up and the rest of the class was seated. Such a view from above does influence just how far into "the valley" you can see, and I started to wonder if certain girls are aware of this. You know how some girls sort of get a reputation for being skanky because of the way they dress? And it's not the guys who brand them that way, it's usually other girls who don't dress the same! But my point is that many of the girls in that class were not ones with such a reputation. Is it possible that "nice" girls have cleavage, too?

This got me thinking about something I heard a girl say once last year: Because of the current styles and fashions, it is hard for girls to find modest clothing. "I can only buy what the stores sell," she said. I don't know if I actually believe that because there are still plenty of girls who don't seem to have a problem keeping themselves fully covered, but maybe there is some truth to it; maybe there really is a fashion trend toward revealing clothes. Based on what's on TV and in the magazine ads now, it certainly seems that's the case. But still...

I noticed at lunch that one of the girls from that class had been given an oversized (and hideous) t-shirt to wear for the rest of the day. Apparently someone referred her to the office, so what she was wearing must have been deemed inappropriate by a faculty member, but I also saw a couple of the other girls from that class who had just as much of themselves on display and who were not referred. This got me thinking about how a dress code is enforced. I mean, who decides what is okay and what isn't? I remember seeing our hall monitor (who is often known by another, less savory, name) having a trio of seventh grade girls kneel outside the office while she measured with a ruler to see how far above their knees their shorts came. (One of the girls was actually crying.) Since I have never read the dress code or been hauled in to have any of my clothes measured, I don't know what the exact measurement is that would require a student to call home and ask Mom to bring some longer shorts, but if such a number exists, who decided that was the line between what is appropriate and what is not? And what makes that person the authority?

Then I really got to wondering. When it comes to shorts, it's easy (and humiliating) to have a student kneel and submit to the ruler. But does the same method apply when it comes to deciding on appropriate shirts for girls to wear? (Do they actually measure something with a ruler before they decide who has to wear the hideous oversized t-shirt for the rest of the day?) Then I remembered another one of those lines from a former administrator about how girls should not wear very tight shirts that were "form fitting." The girl behind me in that class whispered to her friend that she was once forced to wear the hideous shirt from the office because they said her shirt was too "form fitting", but her friend had worn the shirt the next day and no one said a word. "I got punished for having bigger boobs!" she hissed angrily.

When I remembered that, I started thinking about what would have happened if a boy had worn the shirt. Would he have been sent to the office because it was too "form fitting"? Is it really fair to make a dress code based not on the clothes themselves but on the size and shape of people's bodies? Hmmm....

A couple years ago, thong underwear and belly shirts were popular, and it wasn't uncommon to see girls with the top of their flourescent orange thong sticking out the back of their low-slung jeans. I haven't seen as much of that lately. These days it seems to be cleavage. I don't want to moralize, but I will say this: Ladies, what you see in the mirror every morning when you get ready for school may not be what I see when I stand up to sharpen my pencil during class. Maybe some of you know that already, but I just wanted to warn those who may not. And just so you know, rather than sneaking a look down your shirt, most guys would rather look you in the eyes and have you smile and say "hi." Try it sometime!